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Society tries to stomp out our emotions and kill who we really are. After being changed it is worse, much worse. You see after being changed you stay who you are in your mind. Twenty something years of personal history is very hard to throw away over night. There is no magic to wearing girl's clothes, or to sex, or to hormones. Heck, ask any scientist, hormones may amplify emotions but they do not create them or control them. With time you do adapt to the change, but adaptation does not mean you love it. You keep your old mind but have to act like someone else to survive. It makes the oppression of day to day life much worse. I step off the bus onto my driveway and walk up to my house, I go inside and slip off my dress and read the paper while smoking a cheap cigar. Soon after my wife comes home. She?s uncomfortable with my body, wearing business suits and it shows. She?s in sales, and she?s a good sales person too. It?s a pity she couldn?t handle my management job. The first thing. It still did, and while I had some measure of control during our intercourse, once Shadow's knot was lodged inside my cunt there was nothing I could do but wait. The door was locked, the curtains drawn so nobody could see us, but the possibility lingered and the fear fed my excitement.Well, if I'm to be completely honest I'd have to admit that Shadow could pull out of me if absolutely necessary. But where's the fun in that? It would have been uncomfortable, maybe even painful, and I much preferred believing that we were bound helpless in the most compromising situation imaginable. Thankfully, I'd never been forced to concede my emotional fantasy to biological reality. I wanted to be locked up like a bitch in heat and my lover wasn't going to complain!Ten minutes passed before Shadow's knot had started to shrink and it took another three or four after that before he was able to pull out of me. Like a cork coming out of a bottle, he pulled my cunt inside out and it felt almost painful.
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